Tuesday, December 18, 2007

This morning I slept in a little longer. When I fell asleep last night, it was about 8:30. This morning, I woke up at 8:30. 12 hours of sleep! NOW I'm on vacation!! Well, it made it even more special when I made cinnamon rolls for breakfast (thank you Pilsbury!!!!)

After the nice warm breakfast, we decided to bundle up and explore the back yard of this house. When you first drive up, it looks so tiny from the front, but the downstairs extends down a slope which leads to a river. I'm sure it is so beautiful any other times but with nothing but white powder everywhere, it was amazing!!!

Not sure what is underneath all of the snow, we waded (and yes I mean that--the snow was above my knees!) out just a few yards. Of course I couldn't resist, so I plopped down on my back and made a snow angel...and afterwards found that it was difficult to get up to not 'mess it up'.

Not long after I figured out how to get up and away from the angel (no real damage done!) we wandered back up to the house, where we stepped out onto the upstairs deck. I bet it was beautiful naturally, but the snow enhanced it tremendously! The table outside was covered at least 1 food with snow, so it made for the perfect location for my first snowman! Well, let me clarify that--I have made snowmen before, but it was a Texas slush-man...not quite the same (but I was proud of him at the moment!)

The snow didn't pack together properly, so the snowman went from the plans of being tall to very small...about 6 inches high I think. But he was so cute, and I was so proud of him!

After the joys of freezing our hands while creating the snowman, we decided to make a drive up north to Stowe, a popular ski-town in Vermont. There is a hamburger joint there called The Malt Shop that Cary and his parents have eaten at before, so we decided to go there for lunch. Interesting combination--milkshakes in the freezing cold!

Stowe was a cute small town, very much unlike Lewisville and Dallas (in size, not cuteness--though the snow made it magical!)

After eating at the Malt Shop (hamburger, fries, and chocolate milkshake!!), Cary drove us over to the Cold Hollow Cider Mill and gift store. Cary loves this place because it shows how cider is made right in front of you. They even have samples to try!! The place was also full of items to buy, including candy, honey, candles, wall decorations, kitchen items.... I picked a cute wall plaque for mom with a snowman on it.

After walking there we walked across the parking lot into the Fudge shop...such a variety of fudge!!!! While there, Cary showed me a Gund beaver (Gotta Getta Gund!) that I couldn't resist buying. We later named it Svea, after the owners of the house we were renting for the week.

Of course we bought fudge. And I think it was gone pretty quickly. Wouldn't know why...

We were satisfied with our souvenier buying for the time and decided to head back towards Woodstock, but not without a stop at our favorite ice cream factory--Ben & Jerry's!!! They offer factory tours here, so we signed up. Cary's family had visited there before but never took the tour, so we took advantage of the opportunity, not knowing when we would be able to again.

It was a neat tour, starting with a short video of how Ben & Jerry started, and then we moved along to a room where we could watch the factory workers below 'make' and package the ice cream. It was interesting to watch because some would 'show off' and spin the stacked cups that were really tall...they really seemed to enjoy their jobs! The final process of the tour was taste-testing a bit of ice cream. The flavor of the day: chocolate chip cookie dough. Go figure--it was one I had had before!

After we finished the tour, the sun was starting to set, so we decided to skip the B&J's graveyard and head home. We decided to try our luck again at the East Ender, and this time, we were in luck--they were opening their doors in 15 minutes!!!

We sat down to a dinner that ended up being delicious--I had chicken with a sauce (I wish I remember now) and Cary had pot roast. He said his wasn't as good as mine, and I have to be truthful--I believe him. Mine was so good!!!!!

We made it home in time for us to sit down and watch the ABC Family movie called Snowglobe. I had been seeing the advertisements for this made-for-tv movie for a while and was looking forward to seeing it....too bad I fell asleep 30 minutes into it!

Monday, December 17, 2007

For some reason I woke up at 6:00 this morning.


Maybe because it was chilly inside the room (we left the window open to feel the brisk breeze).


Maybe it was because I was on vacation.


Maybe it was because I was a newlywed!


Or maybe it was because of the large 18 wheeler braking as he was going downhill across the river and the brakes were making an obnoxious noise.

**Note--this truck (or perhaps another) did this every morning while there...


So up we go! We ate breakfast (a tradition for Cary--eggs, biscuits, and sausage with a touch of maple syrup), bundled up, and drove to some shops across the (frozen) river and a little ways down from the house. One of the shops we visited was Simon Pierce, a shop that does glass blowing. The things they create are beautiful! And you could go downstairs and watch them do it as well. I wanted to buy some pieces (ornaments for our tree and souveniers), but I was afraid of how they would be transported home.


After warming up in there, we ventured out to the covered bridge (my first one!) and looked over at the frozen river. There is a waterfall just in front of the bridge which was, well, not falling. It made for great pictures though!


We drove to Queechee, a place that is famous for its Gorge. Well, the most I got to see of it was as we were driving over it...I looked out the best I could, but could only see a glimpse of its frozen depth. In other words, we didn't stop and walk to the bridge because the sidewalks were not cleared.


Shopping time! We stopped at a couple of shops in Queechee and found some shirts and other fun items. We went into a store that sold plates and kitchen decorations. We wanted to, but it wasn't open, go into the train/lunch box museum...How cool would it have been to see nothing but a bunch of lunchboxes?!!!! (that is not sarcasm--I can't wait to go back and see it!)


After doing some shopping Cary drove us around a bit to little towns like Sharon, North Pomfret, and South Pomfret. The area is so beautiful! And with the freshly fallen snow, it felt like magic in the air.

The route we made took us in a circle and we found ourselves back in Woodstock conviently around lunch time. We took a moment to stop at a beautiful white church that has one of Paul Revere's bells in the front. This is a historical place, but I think I was most excited when I found pink and blue snow...I know it was from some chemical to help melt the snow, but you see white snow, yellow snow, and even brown/black snow, but not these pretty colors!!!




We decided to eat lunch at a little sandwich shoppe in Woodstock's square. This place was known for their "Mile High Apple Pie". I had a grilled cheese sandwich, but didn't eat much, but some of that is due to the fact that I never eat much while on vacation.


We visited some of the shops after eating, just doing a little 'window shopping' and enjoying the small town feel that is Woodstock. One of the stores had a bunch of games in the basement for sale, and Cary and I found one that we could play together: Hoopla. We also bought a deck of cards in case that game was not enough entertainment (there were no other games in the entire house!).



We then went back to the house to play the game. One of my favorite things about this game (and it was perfect for a honeymoon) was that you play with the other people as a team against the timer. So instead of competing, we were trying helping each other. It was a great way to pass the time together.




That evening we drove out to a restaurant that Cary had eaten at the previous summer: East Ender. We wanted to go and eat dinner, and perhap have dessert, but when we got there, we saw that they were closed. :o( We opted to go back to the house and finish off the pizza for dinner (and enjoy a little Ben & Jerry's as well!)

The Day After...And The New Beginning!

This morning we woke up in Boston. The flight here last night was delayed an hour, but Cary kept me calm and reminiscing about the big party we just had.

The morning was one I had never experienced before: just after we landed here (about 10:30 p.m.) we waited in the brisk cold for our bus. There was some snow around the city, but nothing like this morning. A Nor'easter had blown through during the night, and Cary and I woke up to so much white! The air was so thick with the snow that you couldn't even see the airplanes at the airport from our hotel room window, which was only about 150 yards away!

We spent our morning watching the snow. The most entertaining part was watching the Bobcats and trucks with the plows run along in the parking lot and scoop up the snow. The Bobcats turned the tightest circles, and the snow was so heavy that it would be on 2 wheels at some point! The trucks would drive at about 15-20 miles an hour, scoop up the snow, and then run directly into the curb to dump the snow...no brakes applied!

After a little time of watching this, Cary and I decided that we were hungry and made our way downstairs to the breakfast buffet...a FABULOUS spread which consisted of eggs, bacon (actually every breakfast meat imaginable), bagels (and again, every pastry imaginable), fruit, cereal, milk, juice, and the most bizarre--sushi!!!! It was really delicious--and it should be: $20/plate!!!! Needless to say, we tried our hardest to eat our money's worth!

After eating, the roads were still too white and the snow falling too hard for us to think about leaving the hotel. Cary was smart and asked to book us for 2 nights, just in case we could not get out. We wandered the hotel for a while, going into the gift shop and looking over everything at least twice (and slowly!) before making our way out. Good way to spend 30 minutes!!! We found the conference rooms, but they were locked, stared at the scary Nutcracker (from behind he looked like a demon!) and then went back to the room. There, we found Beverly Hills Cop on tv. Within 5 minutes, we were both asleep again!

Once we woke up around 1:00, we viewed the weather and decided that the streets were clear and that we should give it a 'go' to try to get to Woodstock. We got to the car rental place and found the car they put aside for us, all snow dusted off. So, we jumped it to head off.

When we got to the checkout booth at the exit, though, the lady who checked the tags told us that this SUV was scheduled to go to the dealership for maitenance. Nothing special about this, except we had to go back to get another one. And as she told us this, a snowplow drove by. She saw this ahead of time at started yelling "Ice! Ice!!" By the time we realized what was happening, though, the truck drove by, spraying dirty ice and snow all over the car and inside her booth. It was such a funny moment!

We finally got our next vehicle, and were finally on our way around 1:45. This vehicle wasn't too bad, except that the windshield kept freezing and the wipers were poor and needed to be replaced. The solution we had for this was to drive with the heater/defroster all the way up and the windows opened slightly so we could get some fresher (and cooler) air.

The roads were covered with snow, and at some points we were ahead of the snowplow, so we drove slowly in a single lane behind other cars. There were moments that you could see the road, and apparently the 'one lane' was actually 2 with the separation lines in the middle. It was fun driving that way...I felt like we were getting away with bad driving!

At some point there was a snowplow on the shoulder of the road and ice and snow flying up in the air, dropping in the middle of the road. Cary and I saw other cars drive through it, so he followed suite. Well, it turns out that rocks were also flying out of the snow plow! No damage was done, but Cary made sure he didn't do that again!

We finally made it into Woodstock around 5:45, after stopping on the road and giving the windshield a good scraping. During that moment, we were in New Hampshire, and he was debating on stopping for the night because it was starting to get dark. When we looked at the map, though, he realized that we were only about 30 minutes from our destination, and continued on.

The moment we drove over the bridge into Vermont and headed down the road toward our tiny town, I saw a change in Cary. Earlier on the road, he was noticibly calm as he concentrated on the drive (and I don't blame him--it was a first for me to be in that scenario!). Now he began talking quickly and excitedly about the town we were about to see, as well as Quechee Gorge, and the memories he had from being there before (including the summer).

We finally made it to the house he had rented for the week. From the outside, it was a cute, small white house, with bushes decorated with Christmas lights. But because of the storm, there was a thick blanket of snow on it.

We stepped inside and saw such a beautiful house. Upstairs was the kitchen and living room, complete with 1/2 bath tucked away in the corner, and a beautiful glowing fireplace. Apparently, this fireplace was the heating system for the entire house. The higher the fire, the warmer the house.

We made our way downstairs where we checked out 2 bedrooms. One of the rooms had the bed built up in a little closed in space by the window. The other bedroom was the master bedroom, large with a small sitting area.

After we checked out the house briefly, we decided to go find food for the night. Cary drove us to a little supermarket called Mac's. Here, we bought some supplies for breakfast and dessert (Ben & Jerry's!). Everything else was closed except for a pizza joint, so we drove over there and ordered a pizza (and met a huge friendly fish as well!). We finished off the night taking the pizza home and eating it and watched a little tv.

December 15, 2007

This is the big day! This morning I will become one with the man I know God has created for me.

11 months ago, I started dating what was a new friend from our bible study group. And 6 months later, we were engaged. It seems so quick, but it was also so right. And now, 5 months later, I was waking up, excited to squeeze into a beautiful white gown and celebrate with my friends and family.

Planning this wedding was very much bitter sweet for me. What I wanted originally was to get married outside on a beautiful Fall day, most perfectly in the hills or mountains. However, Cary was in school and wasn't set to be out for the semester until mid December. So, of course, I changed the plans. And looking back now (nearly 1 year later), I am glad that the events happened the way they did. I had the most perfect wedding day!

The day started out when I woke up at 6:00 and Beth, Katie and I walked downstairs to enjoy a complimentary breakfast served by the hotel. Mine consisted of pancakes. While looking for syrup, I found Cary's brand syrup (the sugar free kind that you can find in restaurants and stores).

Of course I couldn't resist and had the bottle sitting with us on the table, me talking to it like it really was Cary...I know. I'm weird. But my friends knew that before they agreed to be my friends! And more importantly, Cary knew that before asking me to marry him.

Once we got upstairs, it was time to start getting ready for the big event at 11:00. Mom and Kim came to the hotel room to help with hair and make-up (I wanted to be as simple as possible, considering I'm not a dressy person in true form).

It didn't take us long to get ready, and when I was put into my dress, we headed downstairs for pictures. We hired Whitney, a good friend, Lewisville Reserve, and photographer. She was geat to work with our request: while most brides want extravagent wedding photos, I wanted mine (again) to be casual, and not too formal. It was fun, and Whitney did a great job. I have seen her site, and she does beautiful photos of everything. Good eye, Whitney!

After we finished taking the photos, (a few which consisted of the fancy looking luggage rollers you find at hotels) we got a call from Cary saying he was on his way. It was time for us to go back upstairs and wait until time for the ceremony. As we waited (and watched a little tv) we received a lot of visitors: Brenda, Faith, Helen (my little flower girl), Mema, Grandma Wilson, and Barbara Jarvis. I got a few pictures with all of them of course.

Just before the ceremony was to begin, mom came up to retrieve us. Of course we took a moment to have a last mother/daughter time. Of course the tears started appearing, and we heard through the door both Katie and Beth telling us not to cry and ruin the makeup--leave it to them to make us laugh again!

The last song that was played before starting the ceremony was Chris Tomlin's Amazing Grace (My Chains Are Gone). I wanted to play Christian music before the ceremony as everyone arrived. This was the cue for Cary, Pastor Brad, and Brad to start going in.

Was I nervous? Not really. I think the only thing I feared the most was 1) exchanging vows in front of 80 people, and 2) Cary would change his mind and decide not to spend the rest of his life with me. Option 2 was not very likely, so #1 was my biggest fear. But we got through it smoothly.

As dad and I walked down the aisle, I was smiling at the attendants, and didn't notice that Cary's brother decided to put on a big red clown nose. But dad saw it! And Brad's story is that he got a look from him and it freaked him out. He thought that my dad was going to be upset for goofing off at his daughter's wedding! But I know as soon as dad comprehended what he was doing, he was laughing...very appropriate for my wedding!

The ceremony was sweet and simple. No extras for us! Pastor Brad did tell a story about the days when I used to babysit his kids and some of the fun events that happened back then. It made a lot of people laugh.

Once the "I Do's" were said and we pronounced husband and wife, we started the reception off with Christmas music as we walked back down the aisle (which consisted of making a sharp left and heading out the first available door!)

The hotel provided a buffet for us. We had a huge variety of meats and sides to choose from, and we decided on NY Strip Steak, Chicken Courdon Bleu, Potatoes, Vegetable Medley....and there were rolls and some cookies, too I think. In truth, I don't remember much about the menu, as I only really had a bite because I was too distracted by everything else to eat. But my Maid Of Honor(s) made sure I ate!

I guess I want to add, I had Katie as my official Maid Of Honor. To me, Beth was as well, but she didn't get to walk down the aisle for a couple of reasons: she was getting ready to get married herself and I didn't want to add extra stress on her for planning 2 weddings, but also because I didn't really know that I could have 'uneven' sides: I thought for every Groomsman there should have been a Bridesmaid.

Cary had one Best Man, his brother, so I had one Maid Of Honor, and then a Flowergirl. But it makes since to me now, that I could have 2 Maid of Honors, and the Flowergirl could stand next to her daddy up front and even out the sides! (2 bridesmaids on one side and a groomsman and flowergirl on the other!) ...Did any of that make sense? If not, forget that I said it! :o)

Alright, back to the reception. It was held in the same room as the ceremony, and I loved the idea because we had a lot of people travel far, so instead of making them drive to another location (and possibly get lost) we had round tables set around the room so that they could sit and watch the ceremony, drink their water or tea, and not have to worry about much else (except when it was time to eat!).

We weren't really expecting a receiving line (where the bride and groom greet everyone in a line, but again, it was convienent because people were walking over to the buffet and just happen to pass us by at the same time!

I really loved seeing so many of my friends and family there. Some of my family weren't able to make it because of last minute things or because of illness, and not all of my/our friends were there because it would have made the guest list far too big, but they were with me in spirit that day. While music played in the background (not too loud that people at the same table couldn't hold a conversation--thank you Jeff!!!) kids played, we took pictures (Whitney took professional pictures and we had disposables on the table) and ate.

The cakes were beautiful, the brides cake being 3-tiered white with snowflake and snow decorations on it. The flavors were strawberry swirl, chocolate, and white (each layer a different flavor with their own icing/filler). Of course the top tier was saved for Cary and I when we celebrate our 1st anniversary. The toppers were a snowcouple, which Cary and his parents found at a Christmas Store in New England while on vacation earlier that year.

The groom's cake, through, was my favorite: we (being Brenda, my mom, and me) tried to surprise him with an airplane shaped cake. From the time that the 3 of us discussed it and actually sat down with Traci (thank you Traci's Cakes!!!! You did an amazing job!) I was so excited about seeing it actually produced and Cary's reaction to it.

The party wound down around 1:30 with us running out the door admist a line of bubbles. It was chilly outside, but wow! it felt good to me! I was married!!!!

Once we got to the apartment, we showered and relaxed on the couch until Brenda and Gary came to pick us up to go to the airport. We were flying out that evening to go to Woodstock, VT for a week long honeymoon!

The Day Before...

This day I had off from work.

Why? Well, obviously, to spend my last hours as a single person preparing for the most important day of my life this far!

I woke up at 7:30 a.m. Wide awake, no chance to go back to sleep.

Again, Why?

Because it suddenly dawned on me that I did not really have anything nice to wear to the rehearsal or rehearsal dinner tonight. Although I wanted to make the scenario as casual as possible, I did want to look nice for Cary, our family, and for the night. So mom and I trekked off to JCPenney around 8:30 to get the last minute clothing for tonight.

When we finished there, mom and I made it to the manicurists for our mani and pedi. While I sat in the chair (Am I the only one who does not enjoy the massaging chair?!) I got a call from my Maid-of-Honor, Katie. She was almost to Lewisville from Austin!!! I was so excited to get to see her again.


When she got there and I was finished with the manicure and pedicure, I drove her off to visit friends at our old job. I've seen Bridezilla, and I know a lot of brides want to be pampered and catered to on their rehearsal day...However, I wanted her to rest from her drive, and everyone seemed to enjoy seeing her again.


After saying hello to the gang at VCA, it was lunch time! Katie, mom and I met dad at Chipotle and enjoyed a quick meal there. Then it was off to pack the decorations and drive to the hotel.


Mom had strict instructions for me, but poor Katie had a rough task at hand: getting me to relax and take a nap. But after we checked into the hotel room, I refused to listen to her and bounced around, continuing to try to find some way to help everyone for the room setup.


As we were getting our luggage into our room, Katie and I ran into Kathie, Erica, Austin and Gangy, who were in the process of checking into the hotel for Kim, who was on her way up to Dallas from the Woodlands with Addison and Reagan. Apparently, Kim was having a bit of car troubles, and they wanted to make sure she was able to get into the room comfortably.


Katie finally convinced me to take a nap around 4:00. For those who don't know me, I LOVE TO TAKE NAPS!!!

So, why wasn't I so ready to take one now?

Hmmmm... I wonder. :o)

But it wasn't so easy to just lay on the hotel bed and fall asleep.

Maybe it was because of the super firm mattress.

Maybe it was because I could not find Athena at home before leaving for the hotel to tell her 'goodbye' (it was really hard to not bring my cat with me on this new adventure).

Maybe it was because it was bright light outside (despite the drizzly weather).

But whatever it was, I had to go through the process of turning on classical music to try to relax. Somehow, but I'm not quite sure how, I managed to doze for a short time.


About 1 hour after falling asleep, I woke up hearing Katie out in the hallway talking, so I got up, already fully energized and met her out in the hallway. She was talking to Beth, our other friend, (whom I considered to be my honorary maid-of-honor) who was still in Austin at work.

Well, feeling refreshed (and slightly excited) I decided to run down the hallway, of course stopping to look out the window at the end. It was still a drizzly, grey afternoon. A hint of possible snow was in the forecast. To me, it was perfect!


I turned around to run down the other length of the hallway, but I suddenly remembered that mom, Katie, and a few friends had been busy downstairs decorating the room that we are to be married in. So I took a sharp right turn and down the elevator to the first floor.


When I got to the room, I saw what was once ideas in the mind become real. There were 2 small christmas trees and an arbor at the front, decorated simply, but absolutely beautifully (thanks to Donna for the hard work and creative genius!). There were several round tables in the room with white tablecloths, and the centerpieces I worked hard on in (where else?) the middle! I actually got to chip in and help lay out the favors, red and blue Christmas ornaments, on the tables.

Not long after I had adjusted to the fact that this was the room my life was changing in, I heard Katie run in shouting, "Have you seen the bride?! I have lost the bride!!!". We all got a good laugh when she saw me and pretty much scolded me for leaving her site.

Hey! She was doing her loyal duty of making sure I didn't get cold feet!

Fast forward 1 1/2 hours:

It was time for the rehearsal, and Pastor Brad, his wife Teresa, and our families all gathered around to see what needed to be done. Pastor Brad holds to the tradition that the bride does not participate in the rehearsal by walking down the aisle. So my future sister-in-law, Faith, stepped in for me. It worked well because her daughter and husband were part of the wedding party!

It didn't take long for all of us to get through the rehearsal, as it was laid back and casual. So now, it was on to dinner at Bruno's!

Cary did want to see the suite that Katie, Beth, and I were sharing for then night, so along with Helen, we went upstairs to show him. It was a fun task (well for a hyper adult at least) to try to keep him from seeing the wedding dress. And Helen did a good job of assisting. I'm going to love being an aunt!

Driving out to the restaurant, poor Helen kept asking if we were lost, and if Uncle Cary knew where he was going. She was so worried we wouldn't get there!


At Bruno's, a good time was had by all (at least it seemed like that was the case). Attending with us was (and I did keep this in order around the table!):

Gary, Brenda, Helen, Mema; Teresa and Brad Kenney; John Dahlvig; Melissa, Jeff, and Regina Christenson; Faith, Brad, Mom, Dad, and Katie.

We had some gifts for the attendants (Katie a flipable picture frame set, Brad a pen set for his desk, and Helen a star case to hold jewelry and other small treasures). Brad and Faith gave Cary and I books: Power of a Praying Husband/Wife. *Note*: 11 months into the marriage and reading them (slowly), they really are a great gift for anyone!


After dinner, I gave Katie the boot (she rode with Cary and I to the restaurant) and Cary and I went out what was a very brief tour of Christmas lights in a nearby town. He then drove me to a small parking lot overlooking a park in Coppell where we had once sat and talked.

It was a cool, brisk evening, and I felt excitement and nerves racing all through me. In 12 hours, we were going to be married!

While in the parking lot, Cary told me to close my eyes, and as with all moments like this, he gave me a gift--a beautiful pearl necklace and matching pearl earrings! He even went through the task of making sure they were all white gold, as he knows I'm not a fan of yellow gold! How could I not marry this man???!!!

Not too long after he gave me the gifts, he drove me back to the hotel for the night. I was so sad leaving him but, alas, it would only be for a short time more!

Katie was waiting in the room when I got up there (I think we were on the 3rd floor) and so were chocolate covered strawberries and champagne! I didn't have any champagne, but the strawberries were delicious!

Beth arrived around 11:00 from Austin, and by the time she settled it, we were winding down for the night (hey--I had been awake since 7:30 and I knew the next day would be so busy! The 3 of us played a game of Chez Geek, but somehow Katie was falling asleep and she still won!

**NOTE: I have some great pictures of Katie and Beth while we played the game....however, I cannot find them at this time. I hope I find them and don't lose them permanently!!!

Around 11:45 Katie went off to bed with very strict instructions: You can't stay up more than 30 minutes! (hey--still doing her job as a Maid-of-Honor...good job, Katie!) That wasn't a problem because Beth and I pulled out the couch bed and fell asleep watching an episode of LOST (I think I barely made it through the opening credits...)

Goodnight all! Goodnight my last night as a Jarvis!

In The Beginning...

Alright--

If you have been keeping up with me for the last 5 months that I have been blogging, you'll know that I have not taken the time before to post the events that took place the day before, or on, our wedding day.

But for reasons of trying to keep the events that have happened to me in the last year (and soon beyond!) together, I have decided to go through and add several entries from before I actually decided to start blogging.

So, if you are interested, please feel free to read on as I talk about...(dramatic music please)...My Life As A McFadden